Texas Roadtrip Sweaty Wedding and Chilling at the Beach

Last weekend we took some time off to head over to Texas to attend the wedding of one of my cousins. Lisa and I decided to make it our summer trip and extended the time away from home in order to have a little fun in Texas. We are outdoor folk so we opted to do a little camping on the beach in Galveston, but first: the wedding in Houston.

Hot and sticky Houston.

We camped overnight at a KOA in Arlington on our way to Houston. It was there that I encountered my old nemesis from the Midwest: Humidity.

The air was still and thick. I was instantly reminded of sleepless nights in Minnesota trying to sleep, praying for AC, or a breeze through the window.

The girls slept decently well, as did I. Lisa struggled a bit though and she grumbled at us in the morning but some Starbucks coffee helped to settle that out.

 

Houston

We spent some time in Houston wandering around Discovery Green, which was near our hotel. Local eats and a splash park makes for a good time.

We even managed to creep on my mother and sister arriving to the hotel. Spotted them right from our room and then sent them sinister texts.

The wedding was beautiful and low-key but still fancier than I ever dress up. City folk! I pretty nearly tore the head off some of the bridesmaids as we were walking out. They were bitching about how the people with babies couldn’t keep their kids quiet and how they would never let that happen at their wedding. (the italics = snobby voices).

It wasn’t my kids but this selfishness and ignorance pissed me off. These young assholes have never had kids so they don’t fucking know. They don’t know. I had to mentally restrain myself from ripping them a new one. Lisa could see it in me and appreciated my restraint. It happened again at the reception but Lisa reminded me it was not my day.

We let it pass and spent the time at the reception catching up with other family members who had traveled for the event. It was good to see everyone.

Aquarium

Prior to the wedding we spent the day at the Downtown Aquarium. Not the fanciest aquarium I’ve seen but in good shape and just big enough to keep you and the kids busy for a while. We skipped the rides and stuck with the fish. And the tiger. Seriously why a tiger? It was pretty though.

Misrepresentative I know. They let them in.

Galveston Pleasure Pier

After the wedding it was OUR time. We chose to head down to Galveston Island to enjoy the Gulf. Animal had only been to the ocean once and doesn’t remember and Sweetums had never been there. First stop the Pleasure Pier.

Note this is the girls first amusement park. We are either terrible or amazing parents. Take your pick.

It was pretty fucking hot. Lisa melted a little I think.

We had a good time on the rides but it was more fun playing in the waves on the beach. After a day in the heat (and humidity) we headed for the beach and set up camp. It was much cooler with the constant breeze from the water. The girls fell asleep pretty fast but Lisa and I read a bit.

 

In the morning I had a relaxing 6 mile run on the beach. I did it barefoot which was fun. and the view was pretty good too.

I met up with Lisa and the girls after and we spent the day playing in the waves. Animal is one hell of a body surfer and Sweetums plays in the surf with the best of them. We even made a couple little friends.

An old friend even decided to swing by and say hello!

I do want to say: Lisa and I made some amazing little humans. They were patient and excited and amazed throughout the entire trip.

On our way home we stopped and got a treat. Lisa looks suspiscious but Animal looks happy. Sweetums is drinking my milkshake!

Despite all the fun and ice cream, we were happy to make it home to dry, arid (4% humidity) though still hot New Mexico.

 

Enjoy your summer. Stay safe and cool in the heat.

 

Birthday Shenanigans!

Not really any shenanigans but plenty of fun. Last week saw both of our girls celebrating birthdays. Yes they are five years and two days apart. Yes it is fun but also kind of a lot. Mostly fun though.

Animal

Animal turned twelve this year. She’s a “young” twelve though. I think so anyway. She’s not into the pop culture and drama that seems typical of preteens and teens today. I know it’s coming but for now I’m happy to encourage he to keep reading a book a day. Srsly.

Animal made her own cake with a mold recently sent by my mother. She’s really good at this stuff.

Self-made

What’s with the face?

Animal didn’t want a party. Too cool for that I guess or maybe it’s not cool enough? I don’t know, I heard that somewhere.

Anyway she will get a day to herself where she gets to dictate the meals and events that take place. Probably we’ll end up at home reading then watching Avatar: Legend of Korra. Sounds good to me.

While we were at Sweetum’s party I did manage to snag a picture of her that, well it is just beautiful:

Sweetums

Two days later on Friday was Sweetums birthday. She’s seven now. Damn they grow fast. They also made a cake with the mold sent by my mother. It turned out as great as Animal’s cake. These ladies are strong bakers.

We met her at school during the day for a special lunch (Blake’s Lotaburger), followed by donuts for the class as a treat. In turn they treated me to a concert of sone songs they had prepared for Mother’s Day that I (as a dude) did not get to see. Great fun!

Saturday we held a big party for Sweetums. She basically keeps asking for the same party so we keep delivering. As long as she likes it she will get it.

Sweetums party recipe: Jumper, Party Games, Food.

That’s it. A hot air balloon themed jumper which is fitting for New Mexico. Kids love that shit. Lisa put together a number of games for the kids to play. Water Balloon toss, Donut eating and Something about pouring water over their heads into the cups behind them. I dunno where she got them all but the kids loved them. Messy silly wet fun. What else do you need to keep people happy?

Lisa getting in on the fun.

Balloons!

Tossing balloons

Eating donuts hanging from a string.

Surprisingly good at this.

They kids and the adults had a lot of fun. Lisa has received a number of compliments of the party. No one has said shit to me. I didn’t do much planning, just set up but still why assume she did all the work? The nerve!

I am incredibly grateful to have Lisa here to plan and coordinate such events. I am a lucky husband and father to such amazing girls.

Happy Birthday everyone!

What are your favorite party games from childhood?

Weekend Fun, Birthdays and News!

As usual life keeps moving no matter how much I want to sit down and read. Seriously. I’m 2/3rd of the way through Cibola Burn by local authors James S.A.Corey. I hope I meet these guys in a local coffee shop someday just to thank them for the well-written books and consistent characters. Never before have I wanted so badly to play a character in a movie or TV show before reading Holden AND Bull. I guess my chance for Holden as passed but we haven’t gotten to Bull yet.

Weekend Fun

My aunt and her whole family came into Albuquerque this weekend to attend a wedding. WE had limited time with them so we did what New Mexicans do best: eat breakfast burritos. Normally Lisa and I don’t eat this way to be honest but you make accommodations for family. We picked up a variety of burritos, a cornucopia of carne if you will, some Frontier sweet rolls and had at it. We went with Golden Pride, a local chain that consistently wins “Best of the City”. None of them were disappointed.

After breakfast we took them up the Tram to Sandia Peak. It went by a little fast seeing as they had to get back and get ready for their wedding but then again the view from the mountain is stunning no matter how short it may be.

That night the middle-school choir had a celebratory BBQ. I dunno why. What makes coir so special they put together their own year-end shindig? Meh, it was food so we went along to participate. Sort of. Animal got their with her peers and proceded to ignore them all and read. I have trained her well.

Then Lisa and Sweetums and I played frisbee, because I always keep one in the truck for just such an emergency occasion. You just never know.

Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day was pretty low-key which as it turns out is exactly what we all needed. The Baha’i Junior Youth took Animal out for her upcoming birthday (Wednesday), Lisa headed off to do some solo shopping and Sweetums and I hit the links! The Mini-Golf links. Putt-putt actually, yes the one mentioned in Breaking Bad, and yes it is the Bomb.

After that we came back to the house and rested. WE watched a little bit of Avatar: The Last Airbender. We finished Book One of Legend of Korra, but the girls wanted a refresher on the original. I spent some time in the hammock with my new old friend James Holden and tonight American Gods.

News

The big news is that I have been approved to host an after school Dungeons & Dragons activity next year! That gives me the summer to put together a campaign for an unknown number of middle-schoolers. The coordinator scared me by mentioning up to 60 kids sign up but then she said most groups settle in at around 15-20. That’s still a lot but manageable. Still, I would have found a way to make 60 work (with help). If a kid wants to come and play D&D, I’m not turning them away.

So lots to do on this front. I’ll keep you updated as I’m very excited about it and Animal has said she’ll be in my club and she’s willing to DM too!

What do you have coming up? How was Mother’s Day?

Happy Mother’s Day to all!

Meeting Reflections 05-03-2017

     Men and women drink essentially because they like the effect produced by alcohol. The sensation is so elusive that, while they admit it is injurious, they cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false. To them, their alcoholic life seems the only normal one. They are restless, irritable and discontented, unless they can again experience the sense of ease and comfort which comes at once by taking a few drinks—drinks which they see others taking with impunity. After they have succumbed to the desire again, as so many do, and the phenomenon of craving develops, they pass through the well-known stages of a spree, emerging remorseful, with a firm resolution not to drink again. This is repeated over and over, and unless this person can experience an entire psychic change there is very little hope of his recovery.

     On the other hand—and strange as this may seem to those who do not understand—once a psychic change has occurred, the very same person who seemed doomed, who had so many problems he despaired of ever solving them, suddenly finds himself easily able to control his desire for alcohol, the only effort necessary being that required to follow a few simple rules. ~Big Book of AA pages xxviii-xxix

It’s been awhile since I was at a meeting. Life has been busy and finding time for a meeting has not been a priority. Mind you I do not believe my sobriety/sanity is in jeopardy after a couple weeks, but it just feels so much better to get into a room full of alcoholics working towards a better way.

I like this reading. It’s a popular one and something that always jumps out at me is the phrase “cannot after a time differentiate the true from the false“. That was me for sure. I jumped so far into that illusory world of alcohol that I didn’t know up from down left from right or right from wrong.

I spent my time with people who were doing the same awful things as I was or other awful things so my moral compass was not correctly calibrated. Since everyone around me was doing shitty things or the same atrocious things I was, What I was doing must not be that bad I guess! A clear case of the blind being led by the fucked up.

It was an endless cycle of misery. Doing the awful shit I was doing and continuing to spiral down because I couldn’t see a way out. Nor did I want one. Sure I knew on some level I was a shit-bird. That’s why I hid things from my wife and kids, from my family and friends. I knew “normal” people would look on me in disgust but I knew no other way.

In some ways I was comfortable with my alcoholism and lying and cheating. I was a piece of shit but I knew how to live life that way for while it lasted. Getting clean, coming clean was scary as fuck. I knew nothing about a normal life even before I started drinking.

A higher power, AA and honesty have enabled me to have that psychic change. Drastically and gradually I have become…me and not what I was before. I am amazed at how easy it is to live life. I’m not in control (never was) and I don’t have the answers to what obstacles will come.

What I do have is the willingness to do whatever work may be necessary to overcome or mitigate those obstacles and to admit that I can’t do it. I need my higher power who manifests through everyone and everything I encounter to show me I am not alone and together I will endure.

~Josh~

Recent Outings.

Nothing fancy. I wanted to share a few recent outdoor activities with you. First a week ago I went out for a long run in the foothills of Albuquerque. Seriously they never get old. What started out as a rare run in the rain (light drizzle) turned into an even rarer slog to finish in a nasty surprise snow storm.

At first the sleet was a nice change. Not what I usually get here in the high desert. I spent much of the beginning of the run looking for the mountains that were all around me but obscured by the clouds.

Then the wind picked up and gave me a glimpse.

That’s when it turned. The wind that moved the clouds over the mountains brought a change in weather. The rain turned into sleet as I climbed higher into the foothills. The wind picked up. About 7 miles in the sleet became thick heavy snowflakes, still with the wind.

Just prior to a snow flurry!

It came down fast and hard. I was instantly soak through and kept warm only by the heat generated by running. I tried to take a picture of the craziness of the storm but my phone was damp and my hands too cold and wet to activate the screen (seriously ready for the terminals from the Expanse).

I made it home safely. Cold and wet and numbed hands but it was fun?

Date Hike -La Luz!

We’ve been busy lately what with two kids and two jobs and a shitload of other things. Our regular dates had fallen by the wayside. That’s no bueno. So yesterday we took the opportunity to spend some time hiking. It’s a bit of a default for us but that’s because it always works.

We started at Piedra Lisa and took the new route that jogs over and meets up with the La Luz Trail. We had never tried the connector and La Luz has been a distant memory.

La Luz always offers excellent views. We went a couple miles in and had snack break before heading back down.

Contemplative.

A post that at first appeared to be mysteriously marked with runes, simply told us which trail led to the Tram. I liked the runes better.

She had a great time. Can you tell?

FYI piedra lisa means “smooth rock” in Spanish. It’s pointing at her!

La Luz Training Run

I decided to go and make a first attempt at a training run on La Luz. Registration is opening in May for the trail run all the way to the peak so no time to start training like today!

I basically repeated our hike from yesterday but instead I was running.

Slowly.

My goal today was to keep my HR low, hopefully aerobic and try to acclimate to the step trail again. I mostly succeeded. If by that I mean I spent most of the run in the Threshold Zone instead. But staying out of the Max HR for most of it. I call that a win.

Hello old friend.

Me and my Ponderosa Pine friend.

Always more up there.

Lots of sunshine today. Between the hike, yesterdays run and then today’s run I’m a little sunburned. My Mexican skin will soon turn that into a brown tan but today it stings a little. One week ago I was caught in a snowstorm and worried I had gotten too cold while out. Today: sunburn. I love the high desert.

Picture swap!

Side note: both my S-Labs and my Speedcross shoes have 500 miles on them. While they still feel great I know it’s only a matter of time before it hurts. Time to get some new shoes.

Enjoy your time in the sun! What are you doing this weekend?

New Mexico Spring Break Road Trip

Wow, that’s a lot of words in that there title. It is however very accurate.

For Spring Break this year we opted to stay within our adopted home-state and see some of the sights we had not yet visited. One of the unseen benefits of settling down to live in a place you did not grow up is that all the boring, humdrum local things everyone from there takes for granted is new and exciting for you!

I grew up in Minnesota. A wonderful state that by some accounts, just keeps getting better. But I’ll tell you this: I don’t give a shit about the Mall of America. I’ve been to Valley Fair more times than I can count and I practically lived at the MN Renaissance Festival through middle school and into college. All great things but

Been There and Done That.

I’m not from New Mexico so all the “usual” things folks are tired of here are new and fun to me and HOLY SHIT how can you be tired of all this Native culture and Meso-American History and Old West ghost towns and the amazing beautiful natural wonder that is this entire God-Blessed State?!?!?!

Day 1

Mostly a travel day. We headed south from ABQ and drove to Elephant Butte for a lovely picnic lunch and a break from being in the truck. What we got was a windy, gritty, rainy lunch and a brief break from being in the truck.

Seriously it was so windy we thought we were going to blow away and the rain that hit us felt like it was coming from 100 miles away. We ate quickly and got back into the truck to continue to Silver City. Included along the way was a stop over at Percha Creek and a view of the Chino Copper Mine.

 

Once we got to the KOA cabin in Silver City we settled in for the night and let me tell you it was easy. The KOA cabins in general are nice and clean and cozy but the KOA in Silver City was the nicest we have seen yet. I’ll stay in a KOA cabin over a hotel any day.

 

Lisa and the girls relaxed after a quick dinner partially supplied by us and the pizza part supplied by the KOA kitchen.

Those were the most serious pictures I could get. Really.

We’ll get into day two next time. Until then, enjoy April.

Did you go anywhere for Spring Break? Where? With Whom and Why?

 

 

 

What’s happening?

Apologies for the long delay in between posts. Lots has been happening to keep life…..constant.

Work while still great has been relentless. It’s Cold and Flu season so everyone is coming into the clinic with a sore throat and sinus pressure. Add to that the allergy season has started early and strong here in New Mexico…. Work is busy.

Outside of work, well life is busy there too. We and Baha’i’s around the world are in the tail end of The Fast. From sunrise to sunset for 19 days we neither eat nor drink. It’s rough but spiritually gratifying. Don’t talk to me at 4pm because I’ll be pretty salty (salty here means grumpy and liable to say something mean in a snappish manner).

Rain Wilson wrote an article a number of years back about the Fast (read it here) and he’s right it is tough and uncomfortable (it is supposed to be) but it places perspective on things.

It hasn’t all be rough and tumble though. There has been plenty of fun and exciting activities keeping us busy. Just before the Fast is Ayyam-i-Ha which we celebrated by getting all the local children’s classes together for a skating party! Roller skating is harder than I remember, I spent more time on roller-blades as a kid but still Lisa and I made most of the other adults look like beached walruses. Sweetums of course had a blast. Animal is old enough now to be too cool to hang out with us for pictures.

Sweetums school library held a Beatrix Potter fancy Tea shindig (my name for it) and we got all dressed up!

Of course no weekend is complete without a trip to the archery range. Animal got a bow for Christmas and we had not made the time to adjust it and try it out. She invited a friend along who had never shot a bow before. Sweetums I think looks like a Pro.

Serious bow face!

She means business.

Finally we have been playing a lot of board games at our house. Clue is a recent addition that everyone loves. I had not played since I was Animals age and it showed but I’ve won my fair share of games.

Animal and I continue to play Tak. It gets more fun and more complex every time. Mostly we are evenly matched but some days she kills me.

OK I got that of my chest. Happy to have said something at least. It’s been on my mind while I do all that other fun stuff. Oh and DnD. I do some of that pretty much every day.

See you around here soon.

 

What’s been keeping you busy?

Meeting Reflections 02/23/2017

I was found guilty and sentenced to sixteen months in federal prison. My two co-defendants received twelve-month sentences and chose to remain free pending appeals, while I chose to go into prison and get it over. I had learned how to live life on life’s terms and not my own. From somewhere back in my high school days, I remembered a poem that says something to the effect of, “Cowards die a thousand deaths, a brave man only once,” and I wanted to do what had to be done. I was terrified of walking into prison but told my children that I could not come out the back door until I walked through the front. I remembered that courage was not the absence of fear; it was the ability to continue in the face of it. ~ AA Big Book pp.526

 

I’m Josh and I’m an Alcoholic. I was raised and trained to be an alcoholic. The reading discusses responsibility and taking ownership for owns own actions. I did not know how to do that. I never had to.

I don’t know about you folks but I had a shitty childhood. Well not all of it but some very shitty things happened: my parents split, I think I witnessed some abuse, I was kidnapped across international borders (twice)…yeah stuff happened.

My point is that I was kind of given a free ride. If I acted out or misbehaved they let it slide. “Josh has been through so much….” and so forth. If I withdrew (and I did) and cut off and severed my connection with people and reality I was also given leave to do so. I could kind of do whatever I wanted whenever I wanted.

In retrospect I could have gotten away with a lot more shit than I did. I kind of wasted it. But I did get away with a lot. If my girls tried to do half of the things I did they’d be in such deep shit.

Being immune to repercussions led straight into my drinking career and was reinforced by it. I was continuing the belief that I could drink and lie and cheat and do whatever and not have to be responsible for it. I knew I was being an ass so I lied and misdirected and manipulated in order to avoid consequences. And in my experience it is a lot easier to keep doing shitty awful things when you don’t have to answer for them.

Since rebuilding a relationship with my Higher Power, since coming into the rooms and making that decision to hold myself accountable I’ve stopped doing those shitty awful terrible things. Living each day to hold myself accountable for my thoughts and actions prevents me from committing them. Knowing I will not hide behind lies and I will be answerable to my Higher Power, to my friends and family and the people in this room encourages and strengthens my ability to be honest and do the right thing.

And now, I can stand there and look someone in the eye and meet them on even ground. I can stand there and look in the mirror and look myself in the eye.

O SON OF BEING! Bring thyself to account each day ere thou art summoned to a reckoning; for death, unheralded, shall come upon thee and thou shalt be called to give account for thy deeds. ~Bahá’u’lláh The Hidden Words

Meeting Reflections 01-05-2017

“Deus ex Machina”

The Third Step Prayer:

God, I offer myself to Thee To build with me & to do with me as Thou wilt. Relieve me of the bondage of self, that I may better do Thy will. Take away my difficulties, that victory over them may bear witness to those I would help of Thy Power, Thy love & Thy way of life.

 I love the Third step prayer. It is the solution talked about in the Big Book. It is the way out. For some, for many it is the only way out. Turning my will and my life over to God was the only solution. It is deus ex machina. 

For the uninitiated that’s the term from the old Greek tragedies when things get so fucked up there is no way out so they literally send the Gods down in a machine to set everything right. Deus ex machina – God from the machine. For a more timely reference think of the explanation at the end of the Clue movie.

Maybe it was this one:

No wait….

My life was a God-damned Greek tragedy. I had made such a fucking mess out of my life I couldn’t understand who was friend or foe or who to trust. My family and friends were bewildered by my behavior and could not make sense of what was happening in our lives.

There was no way I could fix that shit-storm, hell I caused it. I was beyond my own power and beyond all human aid. I do not think another human could have helped me no matter how much they loved me.

Finally being willing to turn my life over to God (as I understand Him/Her) was…relief. I didn’t have to know how to fix it I simply had to be willing to do what was necessary. I had to do the work not the decision-making. You see Step 3 doesn’t mean I give it all to God and leave nothing for myself. It means I do what God tells me.

It’s a lot like being in the military. If you’d known me before I joined the military you would have never seen that as a good fit for me but in reality I excelled. All I had to do was what I was told. I just had to do the work. The few times I ran into trouble was when I did my own thing and I did not listen to my superiors. That’s how I fucked up my life-I thought I was in control.

I was one of those drinkers (like many) that was on a path to drink myself to death. If I kept drinking and kept behaving in the way I was I was going to die. The kicker is: now that I’m not doing those things now that I’m sober and living clean and right:

I’M STILL GOING TO DIE.

The thing is that the time I have left will be longer and it will be better. It is better. I was a sorry miserable fuck before. I’m happy now and I want to live as long as I can to be of whatever service I can to those around me.

All I have to do in order to make that happen is keep doing what I’m told. Keep listening to somebody else. That’s why I keep going to meetings. That’s why I keep listening to God and to you.

Thank you for being that somebody else.

For the record: I adore Madeline Kahn.

Another 15 Years in Chicago

Last time we left off (a long time ago I know) with Lisa and I visiting the Bahá’i House of Worship in Wilmette. What is in store for our heroes you ask?

What is the next exciting adventure?!?!

Hamilton! That’s What’s Fucking Next!

I learned that Hamilton was showing in Chicago only after I planned the trip there. Then I learned that there was a Digital Lottery where you can enter to win tickets for $10 each. I entered as soon as we landed in Chicago on Day 1. No dice.

So I entered again in the morning on Day two. We were at the Temple in Wilmette when the email came through…no dice. I didn’t win the lottery. So I hopped on the web and quickly procured some very expensive tickets and surprised Lisa with the news on the L back into the city.

The show is fucking amazing. It is worth all the hype. It exceeds all the hype. If you have a chance to go see it. GO SEE IT. If it is even relatively close to you, GO SEE IT.

I woke up with the songs still in my head and have been singing them ever since.That includes the Mixtape which we promptly bought. I will say this about the Mixtape: it is so good it has me listening to rap, which I don’t do. It has introduced me to new artists I want to follow and reintroduced me to artists I knew briefly a while back (looking at you Ashanti and Queen Latifah) but never really followed.

The Mixtape makes much more sense and has greater meaning after having seen the show so if you can wait until after I encourage you to do so but if not, you will still love it.

Saturday

Unlike the Folksmen, we did a little Wanderin for our last day in Chicago. We made it a point to use our feet as much as we could.

After visiting the shiny “thing” at Millennium Park we walked across the street to the Chicago Cultural Center which used to be The Chicago Public Library. It is gorgeous and worth the trip to examine the detail involved in making a building that honors books and those who write and read them.

No surprise I found a couple old friends there:

Afterwards we walked through Millennium Park again and over to the shore. What was intended to be a short walk turned into a 9 mile hike around the city and through the Navy Pier. I was able to relive some old CG glory with the Mackinaw and general sailoryness with the Navy Pier in general.

Red cap of course.

Being a bit chilled from our long walk we settled into the Crystal Gardens to warm up and snack.

Shortly thereafter we picked up our luggage and headed to the airport. We had some trouble getting home but we were able to do so safe and sound so I call that a win.

Thanks Chicago.